I Am Allergic To Running

Well, my attitude seems better today... but my body hates me. Remember that run I took? I'm thinking I don't know how to run. I don't think I ever learned the art of running. All these jokers who are addicted to running blow my mind. One of my most beloved friends is 50 years old and can't get enough of running! (S I C K !)

Perhaps it has something to do with how big my feet are... or how I haven't tied my tennis shoes since the day they were given to me (part of why I hate running is the trapped feet)... or the way I run (I'm flashing back to a Friends episode)... whatever the reason, I cannot go running without having horrible shin splints the next day week. It sucks! It sucks because it's like trying to cuddle a porcupine- no matter how good it may be for me (what?), it will always hurt me! You know what I mean. I can never grow to love something that makes me want to die.

Enough about the shins. I've got worse problems (shocker, I know).

A couple of years ago, I wrenched my neck really badly. So badly, I could barely move. It was as if my chin was sown to my left shoulder. I had to go to a chiropractor for a couple of months... once I could drive without being a danger to everyone else on the road, I stopped going (those ballars are expensive!)... well, since then, this neck of mine has never really been up to par. Sleeping on it wrong (or running- I should blame running) creates about a weeks worth of awkward positioning throughout my day-to-day life. It sucks. I seem to have jacked it up again... pray I don't kill anyone as I perform acrobatics to check my blind spot.

As much as I hate drugs, I'm going to have to down the ibuprofen for the upcoming holiday weekend. It appears muscles don't bounce back as quickly as my attitude.

Happy Independence Day weekend! Be grateful you aren't Canadian ;) (that's for you, Chris)